After a blighted ovum and a D&C and the feeling of being a failure, even when I stopped and I though that this was for a reason, that God had other plans for us... since we left him out when deciding to use Mirena...it was the least he could do to let us know, that it's not in us to decide, how many or when...it's him
It has been a very humble experience for us, my sister recently found out she was pregnant for the second time, and she was already 20 weeks, it just left me to just sit and question God's decisions, why? why them? why her? what about us?
Couldn't even bear the thought, I couldn't think of it... nor talk to her, seeing her pregnant cracked, punched and squeezed my heart every time.
We moved on... I would worry every month, but not like before...
Not to long ago, and I'm going to make it very short because apparently this dream has other meanings as well, I am still trying to decipher... it started scary but it got peaceful at the end of that part.
Im going to call her my guardian angel, because she came to tell me something in my dream, i can't quite remember what it was about, but during the dream she was with me everywhere I went, and I remember asking for her to visit me often and, she responds that, She had only come to warn me, and that it was very hard to get these kind of permits.
(That is what makes me believe she is a guardian angel.)
At almost the end of the dream, i dared to ask one more question, and it went something like this "am i preggers?" she just smiled and that was all I needed to burst into tears of happiness. She answered that before I even knew!
Yesterday I made T-shirts for our daughter and one for daddy, Telling them about the expectancy.I will post pictures later
I am still kind of worried since the it's just the beginning... in the meanwhile keep us in your prayers